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~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix:

 

  • Status: Member
  • Traditional Artist
  • United States
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  • Deviant since Feb 19, 2004, 4:54 PM
  • 32 Deviations
  • 3,461 Deviation Comments
  • 369 Deviant Comments
  • 18 Forum Posts
  • 10,877 Pageviews

In dire need of hope...

Journal Entry: Thu May 8, 2008, 4:05 PM
  • Mood: Artistic
  • Watching: Sunshine
Hey everyone? How have you all been doing? I hope you all have been doing very well (let me know!)

I want to say a BIG thank you to the comments I received in my last journal way back when last fall. :hug: :hug: You guys are truly the best!! :hug: :hug: Now that school is finishing up in a month or so I'm really excited to get back to some art on here!

Ok I guess I'll let you in on what's been going on lately (read at your own risk!)

Well, I don't really know what to say anymore. Every time I have some hope and positive attitude, I just get let down by people again and again. I keep on wondering when I'm going to get a break, but it doesn't seem to be in the future at all. See how negative I am? It's terrible, really. I hate the person I have been turning into this past year. I mean, I'm already 19 and should be getting a little bit mature anytime soon now!! I need to toughen up a little bit, but I still don't really know how! :dohtwo:

Trying to transfer into this university has been incredibly stressful. I live in a different city than the college and none of the offices or advisors have put any real effort into contacting me back and making me feel welcome. They keep passing me from advisor to advisor, and none of them listen to what I'm saying or express any interest in helping me. I never would've guessed that advisors at a four-year college would be worse (worse = weird, inept at communicating via long-distance means, flat-out lying, etc.) individuals than advisors at my community college. Everyone here at my current school has been so nice, even though all I hear from people is how " pathetic " two-year schools are. Sometimes I truly don't understand the world!

Anyway, I'm really not quite sure what I should be doing anymore in my life. My situation and negative attitude is constantly stressing out my parents, and that makes me feel even more ashamed. I wish I could just turn the thinking switch off in my brain and relax and be happy and nice all the time. I'm kind of stuck going to this university now, so I guess I'll just finish up my undergraduate degree in two years and be done with it, although it's been pretty stressful lately just trying to communicate with them.

Perhaps this is all just a bit of nonsense that I'll have forgotten about in a few years from now, but whatever the heck is going on, all I know is that I need some sun!!! Come back...sun...

Anywho, I'm not sure if any of you have advice or consolation, but I'm always eagerly listening!!

Take care for now :)

Devious Information

  • Favourite movie: Battlestar Galactica, X-Files, Torchwood...wait those aren't movies? crap!
  • Favourite band or musician: 30 Seconds to Mars, Garbage, Burst, etc. --too many!
  • Favourite artist: Alan Lee, Frank Miller, Drew Struzan, Naoko Takeuchi, David Hardy, etc!
  • Favourite poet or writer: AVI; J.K. Rowling; J.R.R. Tolkien...
  • Favourite cartoon character: Professor Chaos, General Disarray, and the Minions! Oh yeah...and my idol Mike the TV
  • Personal Quote: "Apocalyptic and insane, my dreams will never change"

deviantART Notice

Devious Comments

~quon00:iconquon00: 3 days 3 hours ago
hey!! thank you very much for all your nice comments and favs!!
~persephones-secret:iconpersephones-secret: May 8, 2008, 9:12:29 PM
Breaking out the spring/summer clothes already?? WOW, you are brave. Very very brave.

Oh man, I think I just about died laughing when I read that last little motivational part. AAAHHHH!!!! Right back at you! May you reach new horizons of incredible greatness through your art! No wait...not cheesy enough...I'll have to work on that....and ooooh, can I wear a sparkly leotard too??? PINK??

--
words without actions are the assassins of idealism.
~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix: May 8, 2008, 4:36:31 PM
I need some sun >.> I refuse to put on my winter clothes anymore and so I'm freezing every morning when I go to school.

You're welcome :) you deserve MORE nice comments than you get!! Hmmm Richard Simmons of art...I like that. I never really thought about that before, but I guess he can be my new art idol? If that makes any sense? ok, cool.

Keep letting your art shine like the bright sun that it is!! *does another high kick in a sparkly spandex leotard*
~persephones-secret:iconpersephones-secret: May 6, 2008, 9:35:34 PM
I'm still totally waiting for the weather to clear up! Any idea when the sun is going to come to visit us? By the way, thanks for your nice comments :) you are totally the richard simmons of art :P "keep up the awesome work!" *does a high kick*

heeheee X-D

--
words without actions are the assassins of idealism.
~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix: May 4, 2008, 10:22:15 AM
you're welcome; I loved it! I Miss you a lot too :hug:
~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix: May 3, 2008, 12:39:51 PM
Oh boy I think that would be awesome!! I've been wanting to go to greenlake and do that for a long time...but it would be a lot more fun with you :) ok it's a plan.
~persephones-secret:iconpersephones-secret: Apr 30, 2008, 8:37:02 AM
Hey, I posted some new stuff. Also, when the weather finally decides to be nice, I think we should go to greenlake and do some outdoors painting. Ya?

--
words without actions are the assassins of idealism.
=kd8lmno:iconkd8lmno: Apr 14, 2008, 3:17:06 PM
Thank you so much for the :+fav:! I miss you loads. :hug:

--
Shinji: You look like a scientist!
Quimby: I am one! Glad you know!
Shinji: Do you invent things?
Quimby: Don’t all scientists?
Ray: he’s not a real scientist!
Quimby: And he’s not a real human! He’s just some failure!
~persephones-secret:iconpersephones-secret: Mar 15, 2008, 4:04:10 PM
Your fan base demands more art! :-P

--
words without actions are the assassins of idealism.
=drumgirl:icondrumgirl: Mar 13, 2008, 11:22:35 PM Mood: Sadness
:sniff: I hope you're okay! I sent you a few emails but haven't heard from you since Christmas. I hope all is well with you! :hug:

--
:rofl: - [link]
[link]
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Visit my shoutbox!!! :) :boogie:
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My clubs: ~eowynclub:sun:~yesfans:sun:~samwisethebraveclub
~persephones-secret:iconpersephones-secret: Mar 7, 2008, 2:34:26 PM
Oh man, you missed a GREAT day of logic class today! Woe to you!

--
words without actions are the assassins of idealism.
*kilroyart:iconkilroyart: Feb 14, 2008, 10:31:08 AM
Happy Valentines Day :hug::rose:

--
:blackrose: Feel My Heart...Feel My Pain.
....Feel My Tears...Feel My Falling Rain...Feel My Pain :blackrose:
~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix: Jan 9, 2008, 6:57:44 PM
Hey :) Thanks for the compliments (yay for me...lol) your art is superbly fantastic!!
And...I hope you feel better! Get well soon...this is probably too late but I think we have a test tomorrow on 1.1... (damn!)

talk to you later
~persephones-secret:iconpersephones-secret: Jan 9, 2008, 3:37:01 PM
First of all, let me just say this: your gallery is wonderful. Second of all, I'm totally not playing hooky from school today, I swear! I've got a stomach flu or something. Third of all, I demand you make more art! Oh, and fourth of all, I totally got distracted yesterday when I said I was going to go to the computer lab and check out your site. I blame it on the ADD and the lack of food in my system! Seeya tomorrow.

--
words without actions are the assassins of idealism.
~new-age-reject:iconnew-age-reject: Jan 8, 2008, 7:07:40 PM
Thank you for the :+devwatch:

--
Abstract art is a product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
Al Capp [cartoonist]

.pixel-pax.
.emoti-CON.
=kd8lmno:iconkd8lmno: Dec 29, 2007, 1:13:27 PM
Thank you so, so much for the :+fav:s!! :heart:

--
Shinji: You look like a scientist!
Quimby: I am one! Glad you know!
Shinji: Do you invent things?
Quimby: Don’t all scientists?
Ray: he’s not a real scientist!
Quimby: And he’s not a real human! He’s just some failure!
~new-age-reject:iconnew-age-reject: Dec 6, 2007, 4:31:03 PM
You are a really talented artist and you have such great artwork in your gallery, deffinately worth a :+devwatch:!!

--
Abstract art is a product of the untalented, sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.
Al Capp [cartoonist]

.pixel-pax.
.emoti-CON.
=drumgirl:icondrumgirl: Nov 14, 2007, 11:34:29 AM
Awww, I'm sorry to hear that hun! :hug: I know exactly what you mean though.... it's the same exact situation for me! :faint: I hope it gets better for you! And don't be silly, I really enjoyed your critique actually! I found it very insightful and I completely agree with it (When I reply I'll explain it then :D)

It was my pleasure sending the email, I love writing you!!! Take care and hope to hear from you soon! BIG BIG HUGS!

--
:rofl: - [link]
[link]
*************************
Visit my shoutbox!!! :) :boogie:
*************************
My clubs: ~eowynclub:sun:~yesfans:sun:~samwisethebraveclub
~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix: Nov 12, 2007, 12:20:54 PM
:hug: good to hear from you too! (thanks for the email!!!!) School is crazy; my teachers are crazy; it's driving ME crazy!!

You're so welcome ^^ I hope my critique was not too harsh or anything...your work is really fabulous!

Ok take care and I'll email you when I get another break :hug:
=drumgirl:icondrumgirl: Nov 11, 2007, 7:34:13 PM
Thank you so much for the fave and the wonderful comments! It was so great to hear from you! BIG :hug: Hope school isn't stressing you out too much! :glomp:

--
:rofl: - [link]
[link]
*************************
Visit my shoutbox!!! :) :boogie:
*************************
My clubs: ~eowynclub:sun:~yesfans:sun:~samwisethebraveclub
=drumgirl:icondrumgirl: Aug 21, 2007, 8:51:24 PM
Awww BIG :hug: I'm enjoying the summer but it's going by so fast..... WAY too fast! How are you doing? I hope to hear from you soon, I'm getting worried about ya and I miss your emails! I'd like to write you some more but I don't want you to get too bogged down. It was my pleasure though, I LOVE writing you emails! Let me know how your summer is going! :glomp:

--
:rofl: - [link]
[link]
*************************
Visit my shoutbox!!! :) :boogie:
*************************
My clubs: ~eowynclub:sun:~yesfans:sun:~samwisethebraveclub
=drumgirl:icondrumgirl: Aug 21, 2007, 5:54:00 PM
*sniff* I miss you! BIG :hug: I hope you're okay! :(

--
:rofl: - [link]
[link]
*************************
Visit my shoutbox!!! :) :boogie:
*************************
My clubs: ~eowynclub:sun:~yesfans:sun:~samwisethebraveclub
~CurlyQ:iconCurlyQ: Aug 3, 2007, 1:43:39 PM
Heyy! Well, I've been on deviantart for almost 4 years now, so I just wanted to say a big thanks to everyone whose watched me..so THANK YOU SO MUCH! :hug:

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-.:Anna:.-
~NerissaMatrix:iconNerissaMatrix: Jun 29, 2007, 5:45:49 PM Mood: Caring
Hello--so wonderful to hear from you! :hug: :hug: Glad to hear you're doing well :D Enjoying summer? I'm so happy summer is here and I can give my brain a break. Thank you SOOOOO much for the lovely email :D I'm going to reply to it and hopefully clear up my dev message center/upload a new journal and deviation, but I have a killer headache now, so maybe I'll be able to do that tomorrow....

...ok lots of love!! I hope all is well :hug:
=drumgirl:icondrumgirl: Jun 29, 2007, 12:42:38 AM
Awww thanks so much sweetie! I'm so glad to hear that!!! BIG :hug: Doing great! Just relaxing and having fun. How are YOU doing? I wrote you a new email btw today :D Hope to hear from you soon! :glomp:

--
:rofl: - [link]
[link]
*************************
Visit my shoutbox!!! :) :boogie:
*************************
My clubs: ~eowynclub:sun:~yesfans:sun:~samwisethebraveclub